Losing weight as a couple can both be the easiest and hardest thing to do. Why ? Because there’s two of you that get cravings, random bouts of laziness, and your partner will always have more influence over you than anyone else – so you need to be careful.
We’re here to discuss our experience with losing weight together, and some advice we have for couples looking to start losing weight together. It’s not a how-to, but more of a things-to-keep-in-mind kind of talk.
Our story, and how I started getting fit
I was never very active, in fact I was incredibly lazy. I nearly didn’t finish college because I didn’t have enough Phys. Ed. attendances; I didn’t bother even showing up until the last few weeks of the last school year to make up for all of them.
I did end up finishing my degree, with all my attendances in place, but I’d learned my lessons.
However I became much more disciplined and active once I met Dragos in 2016, since he’s a sports type of guy anyway. So we started working out and eating right and generally taking serious care of our bodies, and I’ll tell you now that the switch wasn’t easy.
We didn’t have a lot of weight to lose – I had like 8-10 lbs, and Dragos about 20. It was a process and it took some time and adjusting, but we’re happy we did it.
Your diets will change for the better
This was particularly hard for me, since I’ve always loved cooking, but especially heavy food. Lots of sauces, butter, heavy cream, olive oil, and so on. I was focused on taste and quantity.
So switching to lots of greens and veggies, very low carb (sometimes even zero) meals with lots of lean meat was… well, it was a change that I didn’t like as much at first because I felt very ‘cornered’ in the kitchen – what was I gonna cook, anyway ??
But it passed after a few days and I got creative, especially with spices and herbs. They can seriously help you out, just a heads up.
So one of the things you need to consider is the fact that you both will have a different diet, and it might be a bit odd to adapt to it at first. You can get some low carb meal ideas from our article here.
If just one of you is eating healthy, then you’re going to have a problem. You can’t eat salads and kale and salmon, and on the other hand have your partner much on fast food because soon enough something’s gonna happen.
- either you’ll give in and undo all the hard work
- or you’ll have this big fight based on food, that’s actually much deeper than just “what do you want to have for dinner ? “
So make sure you’re both on the same page there, okay ?
Going to the gym will be a roller coaster
I mean, if it’s just you by yourself, you might go, or you might not. Depends on how hard the wind’s blowing when you leave work. If you have your partner with you, it’s going to get much more fun because you’re two now, and you can keep each other accountable.
For example, we have full time jobs; we go in at 6 am, leave at 2 pm. We’re not terribly exhausted, but we’re still a bit drained when we come home. So we have some moments when one tries to convince the other that we should just go to bed when we get home and skip the gym, but then other one’s like ”excuse me what ?” so we end up going to the gym anyway.
There are some exceptions yes, when we go and take a power-nap for 30 minutes and then go to the gym, but it’s so much easier not to go, right ?
That’s why you need your partner to keep you accountable. So you can actually have the great results you want, together. And also so you don’t get too lazy sometimes.
Encouragement and support
One of the biggest upsides in losing weight as a couple is that you always have each other’s back. So if you start tripping, your partner’s gonna keep you straight, and you’ll do the same for them.
It’s also great to know there’s someone rooting for you, when you can’t do the last set of ab workouts.
I mean, dieting/weight loss buddies are a thing, okay ? And it’s not by mistake, it’s actually much easier and better if you do it alongside someone.
But to have your partner with you ? From start to finish ? That’s a whole other type of relationship building, let me tell you.
Honestly to me this was the best thing that could have happened, especially in the beginning when I wasn’t very into cardio and abs every other day of the week.
Losing weight as a couple means you need couple goals !
You need goals to do this right !
For example when we started working out and losing weight, we didn’t have much of a goal. Well, our goal was just to show up and work out, since discipline was what we were trying to build.
But once we started seeing some results on our bodies and the changes they brought on, we started thinking ”hey, we look good… we want others to think that too !” so basically our goal became to be noticeably fit. We’re not completely there yet, we still have some work to do, some more bulking here, more definition there, some toning… but we’ve set a goal.
So set a common goal, one you can achieve together and enjoy together. For example you could set a goal to get bikini bodies by January, because you’re booking a flight to the Caribbeans for your vacation as a goal/reward so you need to look damn good, right ?
Go make everyone jealous with your bodies ! Get matching outfits in the sizes you want to have when you’ve reached your goal weight !
Just set some goals, okay ? You’ll achieve them some way or another. But you need to focus on them.
Trust and remember your partner
This might not be the most obvious one, but stay with me. It’s something we’ve seen a lot of people go through, or maybe you’ve seem some of your friends go through this.
One of them, or maybe both, loses some weight, they start looking goo. And things change, more people start striking up conversations, more people flirt with them, they get more attention. Maybe they cheat, maybe they break up. It’s rarely ever good.
So it’s easy to fall into the trap of ”oh I can have anyone I want now” and forget about the soul who was with you the entire time.
Weight loss is a process that changes people, yes. Most of the time for the better. But you need to remember that the person you started your relationship with is still there, even if he/she’s 30 lbs lighter and now dyed their hair blond.
The personality’s there, the quirks, the snoring, the weird laugh, the favorite movie… You need to remember why you entered the relationship. If you’re not thrilled with them anymore, then you know what to do.
Just get very clear with yourself on how much of your decision is based on new-found arrogance or actual differences in how you now feel about them.
We hope this post was helpful to you, and the ones to come.
You can check some of our other articles, like:
Or even intermittent fasting for actual fat loss – fat, not just weight !