Weight gain is a serious issue, especially when it comes after marriage. You can see it at a smaller scale with people getting into relationships.
Have you seen some of your friends enter stable, long-term relationships and slowly start packing on more weight ? Were you in that position ?
I know Dragos and I were. Not many months after we started dating, the weight came. Not 20 lbs, but I gained about 8-10 lbs, and Dragos managed to double that. We got rid of the extra weight since then, but we’ve learned our lesson.
We’ve set out to see what can be done to prevent weight gain from happening in the first place, and here’s what we’ve found to be useful and true.
So how can you prevent weight gain after marriage ?
In short, maintaining a healthy lifestyle before you get hitched is the key here. Most often, that means:
- Sticking to whole foods
- Ditching soda and sweets
- Working out regularly
- Keeping each other a priority
- Get off the wedding high
You could say those are all obvious, but they’re something most people either skip over, or do very poorly. This post is meant to bring forward what needs to be done to prevent gaining weight after getting married, and how to go about it so you actually have some success !
So here’s the 4 main keys, broken down:
1. Sticking to whole foods
One thing that contributes the most to weight gain is the diet. Not necessarily what kind of restrictive diet you’re on, but what you eat in your day to day life.
So if you regularly go for frozen foods, pre-packaged meals, fast foods, and other pre-made meals, you’re in a bit of a pickle. Maybe you have very competent reasons.
Maybe you don’t have time to cook. Maybe the kids are being a handful. Maybe it’s just cheaper for you to get pre-made food. Maybe you don’t know how to cook. Maybe you’re always in a hurry.
There are always some solutions, even if they’re not immediately obvious.
- Ask your partner to help with cooking
- Assign some simple tasks for the kids to help you in the kitchen
- Watch a couple of cooking videos on Youtube, to get the basics
- Order from catering companies – some have reasonable prices
- See what you can change in your schedule to make time for quality food
So sticking to whole foods is basically fresh veggies, or frozen if they’re not available otherwise. Unprocessed meat, so a simple cut of steak or a whole chicken is better than cold cuts.
It also means watching the amount of bread and carbs you eat, and making sure they are as ‘clean’ as possible. As in going for wholewheat bread rather than white, brown rice instead of white, whole pasta instead of regular, and so on.
The benefit of that is that highly processed or refined foods carry more weight gain potential, so if you avoid them, you avoid some weight gain.
Also, a small tip from us here, don’t match each other’s portion sizes ! We were guilty of this for too long before we realized the damage.
2. Letting go of soda and sweets
It might seem like this impossible task, but it’s totally doable. Just give yourselves time.
Start slowly, swapping some sweets with fruits, or flavored greek yogurt. Still calories, but less of them.
Get some sweet alternatives you can make at home, we have a few examples here for chocolate alternatives and general sweets.
Switch from soda to iced tea, or just regular tea.
As with weight loss, cutting sugar is a process and takes time. And if you’re both going through it at the same time, it can be an amazing show of support, or a great reason to argue. Make sure you go easy on each other, and give lots of love and support !
That being said, we’re not saying to never eat sweets, ever. We’re just saying it should be kept to a minimum.
Take into account that many pre-made foods have sugar in them, like some white bread, bottled sauces and salad dressings, and so on. Be sure to check the label !
The main problem with sweets here is that it’s a trained taste – so the more you have, the more you want. It becomes easy to lose track of just how much sugar you consume daily.
And another problem is how fast sugar turns into body fat, if you don’t exercise at a higher intensity, and very shortly after eating said sugar.
So it’s best to just avoid it as much as possible.
3. Working out regularly
In your effort to keep the weight off, exercise will be the second most important tool to use. What you eat plays a major role in weight loss and weight gain, but working out and regular exercise is right on its tail.
So what you can do is first off get a gym membership.
We recommend this above any other method because we believe the atmosphere in the gym will keep you working. Seeing everyone sweaty, on a treadmill, or lifting weights, will keep your minds in that zone.
If you’ve never worked out before, it might be super-hard to keep at it. But that’s exactly what you need to do.
Show up, every day, and even if you don’t do very much in the first few weeks, at least you made it there. Get yourselves some good objectives to reach together.
Maybe your husband wants to be able to do 10 push-ups with you laying on his back ?
Or maybe you want to be able to do 10 pull ups all by yourself ?
Get those bikini bods you want, and go to an exotic place to sip coconut cocktails. Whatever come to mind. Even surviving a semi-marathon is a great objective !
Just go, work out, and go again the next day, and the day after that. Or however often you can make it to the gym, but do your best to get there at least twice a week.
This is because in order to get a habit to stick, you have to do it as often as possible.
There’s an article we wrote on working out as a couple – all you need to know before you start working out together, and what we wish we’d know when we started. You can find it here, it might help shed more light on how to properly work out as a couple, and get great results like this.
You could argue that working out at home is just as effective. And it really can be. But it’s much easier to get distracted and lazy at home. The bed and fridge are too close.
4. Keeping each other a priority
This might sound very obvious, but it’s something that happens very often. You get into the relationship, you get married, and you’re so excited to be with this wonderful person !
But life butts in, work needs you up am 5 am, family keeps calling, there’s a pot burning somewhere, and the diapers need changing.
So you take care of the urgent matters, and kind of… forget about each other. Why you even started dating. I know we were very close to this at one point. Work was taking up a ridiculous chunk of our time, cooking and house chores as well, and we often ended up going to bed after a mini-fight.
So, we issued this rule that we still keep. It worked for us, you don’t have to do the exact same thing. But it might give you a few ideas.
So the rule is that every workday, after 9 pm, we stop work and just relax with each other. Leave aside all phones, tablets, laptops, and just cuddle or talk about something not work related.
This gives us an uninterrupted hour of quality-time for ourselves, and it’s working great so far.
Another thing we added, every Saturday night we go on a date. A movie, eating out, just walking, whatever. Just a regular, old fashioned date.
So that’s our example, you can adapt it to your life if you want. Schedule in some couple-time if you must. No shame in that.
A busy agenda is a happy agenda. But make time for yourselves. That can mean getting a nanny, or leaving the kids at your parents more often, or taking the weekend off to visit some place.
Alright, now that you’ve got the 4 keys to keeping the weight from coming after marriage. Let’s talk a bit about why this phenomenon even happens, and then give you some other tips to follow.
5. Get off the wedding high
This is more of a short term thing, but very relevant. The wedding itself is an entire event, sometimes very stressful and takes a toll on your body.
Combined with the honeymoon afterwards, you’ll both feel the effects. Whether you leave the country or not, your honeymoon is not really going to be a time of discipline and exercise.
It will be fun, partying, eating whatever, and just enjoying each other.
But keep in mind that when you come home, your body will show those effects. So, either take care while already on your honeymoon, or be prepared to do some serious work when you come home.
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So why do we gain weight after marriage ?
This is something everyone’s asking, I think. And everyone’s in danger of this happening, even those who are overweight to begin with. We’re going to go through few reasons, the ones most commonly found.
1. Too comfortable with one another
Often times, being comfortable with your partner is a good thing. But sometimes, we get too comfy, let ourselves go. Ladies stop putting on makeup or doing their hair, men don’t change their socks for 3 days. We get into this routine that strips the marriage of a big part of its romance.
In that, putting in the effort to look good and wanting to impress your partner was half the fun in a relationship. Why is being married any different ?
It could be that one or both partners saw marriage as this amazing goal, and once they had it, there’s not much to be excited about. It becomes mundane.
Or maybe you just got to know your partner waaaaay too well, all the nooks and crannies, to try anymore. Not that the love is gone, but you’re married anyway, share the bed and food and money. It’s not like they’re going anywhere, right ?
Well, this is where ‘spice things up’ comes into play. Find a hobby together, go on a trip, look around for ideas. Relive your first date. Shake it off and reconquer each other.
2. A shift in priorities
This usually means children. The couple is no longer the focus, because the kid, or kids, is taking up most of the attention.
And rightly so, since they’re crying in the middle of the night on a Tuesday for the 3rd time tonight, and you can’t tell what’s wrong with them. But they grow up and stop crying and start walking on their own. They get into all sorts of trouble and need a bath afterwards.
So the relationship kind of takes a back seat. Just until the baby grows. Then until he starts school. Then until he goes off for college. Boom, you’re both 55 and overweight now. How did that happen ?
We know raising children is a wonderful experience, and also so so tiring. However your own well being and health should not suffer. Make time to eat properly, and cook at home.
This is where in-laws, neighbors, and nannies come in handy. Even if you can’t have them often, at least every now and then scheduling some quiet time with your S.O. will calm you both, and allow you to rest.
Then, start planning in times when you can cook together to keep the meals nutritious and balanced, or take turns cooking while the other takes care of the kids.
Get as much help as you can, from you partner and family, so you can take care of yourself as well.
3. Unhappy/boring marriage
This can happen anytime, really. And it’s a very large topic, that we’re not going to try and explain why a marriage can be unhappy or boring. It deserves a novel by itself.
But, it’s still something a lot of people live through. And not being physically well can be a sign of depression or boredom in a marriage.
Food is often used as a form of comfort, and it’s easy to overeat, or indulge in too many sweets if there’s an emotional problem.
Always talk to someone you trust about the problems in your relationship, since they might have some seriously good advice.
A few extra tips to keep in mind
We’ve covered what to do to prevent weight gain after marriage, and we’ve covered some common reasons weight s gained in a marriage. All in the effort to help you understand the topic from all angles.
Finally, we’ll leave you with a few final tips, that we’ve gathered from friends and family, to see what they did to keep the weight off. Here they are:
- Keep your friends close. Either the same friends, or make new ones, but keep some company. If it’s always just the two of you, it’s easy to fall into a routine. Your friends keep things fresh, and will point out when you’re starting to get fluffy.
- Take up a hobby together. This is for the same reason as the friends, to be out and about with people, keep yourselves fresh. Many couples just tend to their nests after marriage, so be sure to keep some social activities too.
- Talk to other couples about it. Ask them what they did to not gain weight after marriage, if you have any examples around you. You might be surprised what ideas they come up with.
Whatever you do, remember why you entered your marriage, and that the weight can be kept from coming, if you are both careful. Good luck !
We hope this article was helpful and gave you some very good info on how to prevent weight gain after marriage.
Feel free to look around our blog, there might be other articles you’d like.